My Heart Nearly Stopped Tonight

One of my worst nightmares as a parent nearly happened tonight.

He is my heart. 

And for a frightening time tonight feared I'd lost him. 

This sweet, precious, stubborn, silly little boy. He loves to snuggle, to climb things, tickles, to be sneaky, and to count.  And his blankie. This little boy who mirrors me in temperament in so many ways.

Tonight was a rare night that I got to pick the boys up from school.  I love being able to drop them off and pick them up.  I picked up Connor at preschool first, then we headed over to Christian's school to pick him up from Kid Kare.  Christian and the other kids were playing on the playground.  I ran inside to grab Christian's backpack.  When I came in the hall, Christian and the other kids had come inside, as that time of the afternoon had come.  "Where's Connor?" I asked.  Christian said, "he's in the hallway." 

As I looked, he wasn't there.  I looked out on the playground and didn't see him.  Looked down another hallway, and didn't see him.  Checked Christian's room, didn't see him.  Looked outside again (got locked out), didn't see him.  Around this point, Christian's wonderful teacher joined us in the search.  Soon, all the kids that were still at Kid Kare and the other teachers were helping look for him.

We looked in the gym.  A natural place for Connor to go. He wasn't there.  We looked in every classroom, the kitchen, the bathrooms, the storage room, the utility room, the Sanctuary, the church office, the fellowship hall, back onto the playground, the parking lot, upstairs, downstairs, everywhere.

With every passing empty room, my heart began crying.  Where was he?  Where did he go.  God please help us find him I cried. 

After about 15 minutes...it seemed like hours, I was making a loop outside of the church, through the parking lot, looking at busy Watson Road.  Where is he? 

Then I heard a cry-"We've found him."

Thank God.  Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

The mother of one of Connor's classmates had him in her arms coming across the far end of the parking lot.  She had been driving on Watson Road to pick up her daughter from Kid Kare and saw him on the side of the road (in the grass she assured me) near the apartment complex that neighbors the church.

Oh my gracious.  Oh my....

I grabbed that sweet boy and sank to the ground.  He wrapped his arms tightly around my neck.  "I was looking for you Mommy."  He clung to me for a long time, and all he would say was "I was missing you Mommy."

Oh baby, I'm not letting you go. 

It appears that when the kids came into the building, Connor did come in with Christian, but decided that he wanted to go back outside to play.  He didn't tell anyone that was what he was going to do. Independent as he is, he headed out to the playground.  When he got out there, there was no one left, and when he found he was alone, he tried to get inside, but the door was locked. He thought (as a three year old naturally would) that we'd left.

So he started looking for us. 

He headed in the direction of home, all the while, looking for us.

I can't even begin to put into words how grateful I am to the mother that brought him back to me.  And to Mrs. Belsha and everyone else who helped search for him.  So grateful. So thankful. 

Even Christian was worried.  He helped search.  When Connor was found, Christian hugged him and said "we were worried about you."  Shortly after that, Christian informed his brother of the safety rules. "Don't ever go away without telling a grownup, Connor."

In addition to not letting him out of my sight from now on (he may have to come to work with me tomorrow) is getting anything he wants tonight.  So far he's only asked for McDonalds and Jake and the Neverland Pirates on tv.  I hope tonight isn't the night he decides to ask for a puppy, because he'd get it.

I love this little boy.  Always and forever. No matter what.